Art and Sexuality is a complex dance. Sexual Persoane and the fetish of the object is a conversation nature and the arts have had with each other since cave paintings. Procreation is only half the story and imagination tells the other half.

Pop Culture has had a fun love affair with sexualizing non-sexual objects. From American Pie to films with sexual car crashes we have had an interesting and diverse perspective on what turns us on.

This trend is going deeper and adding more layers with a political context. This is in full view with “A Confederate Flag Turned Me Gay.” The short story starts with the protagonist taking a shit at the gym when he sees a Confederate Flag on the wall with a hole that speaks, “Stick that gorgeous dick in here big boy.” He believes this to be a woman and gets fantastic oral sex through a Confederate Flag gloryhole.

The protagonist then spends many months masturbating about the mysterious and sultry flag. There’s more sexual exploration as he uses the Confederate Flag and a tube sock to masturbate. But our character, though a Southerner, discloses that he had no previous love or knowledge toward the Confederate Flag.

His sexual discovery leads him to start the website “Sexy Rebel Hoes” and feel content with life. Yet, he is missing the same erotic bliss that the Confederate Flag blow job gave him the gym bathroom.

This is a telling commentary on modern life and the eroticism of beliefs and symbols. Our character is driven by money but yet he longs for his first love like a modern-day Southern Jay Gatsby.

As he is interviewing for future porn stars for his site, a man named Leo Dick comes and visits the protagonist. Like a soap opera twist we learn Mr. Dick was the one behind the Confederate Flag gloryhole. Straight, gay, those are only labels that Confederate Flag conquers and desire wins. The sex they have is raw and passionate and though our protagonists tries to pretend it was ‘Busty Betsy’s’ ass, he accepts it was Leo and The Confederate Flag has made him gay.

Even though the plot is pretty is pretty straight forward, the symbolism is not so clear; it is telling that the Confederate Flag invites different views. Is the Confederate flag making the protagonist so aroused that we take to Nietzsche’s sentiments and become who we are? Is it a commentary about how me romanticize the past, the way Southerners do, where they don’t realize the truth? Is the Confederate Flag really a symbol of love or is itself just a gloryhole for white men who feel lost in modern times?

These are questions proposed but not answered in this story. Like a poem “The Confederate Flag Made Me Gay” deserves a few readings. The story has its flaws. There could have been more character development and I would have enjoyed more surrealism in the sex scenes. It still belongs in the cannon of solid bizarre erotic. This was a neo-realist political story with a touching tale about the power of symbols and memory.

A Confederate Flag Made Me Gay


Christoph Paul is an author of books of humor, satire, and poetry. His next book will be A Fair & Balanced Fuckfest

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