Christoph’s Top 3 Craft Books On Writing & Other Pretentious Bullshit

Because I am so prolific and brilliant; I decided to share my writing secrets which is really just reading the hell out of 3 craft books and talking to this director dude at a diner for brunch on Saturdays. Character & Preimse The Art of Dramatic Writing This book is great. It is a keep […]

Anis Shavini Deserves an Honorary MFA (Review of Againist The Workshop & My Tranquil War)

I am just having fun with the title. I’ll state from the beginning if you are looking for an anti-Shavini piece defending the MFA process go to the Huffington Post Message boards and speak of the joy of debt and shitty jobs (I have an MA in creative writing and worked for a porn store–I’m […]

Jaleel White’s (Urkel) Agent Pitches Him Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus

Setting: A posh coffee shop, in L.A.; Jaleel White aka Steve Urkel walks in to meet his agent Josh Weinstein. Agent: Jaleel. Look at you. Handsome as ever. How is life?” Jaleel: Mother fucking hard. The royalty checks they are not enough anymore. Why are we at this place? I hate this place. Agent: What […]

Transcript of The New Jersey JuggalosB4Hoes Chat Room

ThatIsNotClownMakeUpOnYourFaceItsMyCum: Hey fags, stop sucking each other’s dicks and listen the fuck up! The greatest musical act in the galaxy is coming to Jersey. That is right cockwads! the Insane fucking Clown Posse! Ever since I saw it posted on their MySpace Page I have been waking up with a raging boner. SlimShadySucksDicksJuggalo4ForLife: New Jersey […]

Pitchfork Indie Rock Intern Interviews Tyga About ‘Rack City’

*Author’s Note, if you are unfamiliar with the awesome crunkness of the rap artist Tyga please watch his video Rack City. If you have already, watch it again, enjoy the booties and then enjoy this leaked interview between him and Pitchfork. Pitchfork: Thank you Tyga for coming, we are glad you are taking the time […]

Hustle & Fly: The Story Of Pasquale The Pigeon Pimp.

Bitches ain’t shit but hoes & breadsticks. That is on the real, mother fuckers; I’ve been pigeon pimping since a nigga’s feathers turned red. Shit…while all these other herb birds are hanging in the park shitting on statues I’m flying to the back alley behind Nino’s pizzeria on St. Marks. It’s dem breadsticks’ yo, my […]

A Shark’s Tale: Led Zeppelin Episode at The Edgewater Hotel

*Author’s note. Here is the mud shark’s side of the story of the Shark Episode of Led Zeppelin. How’s it hanging dudes and duderinas; I am the most famous shark in the world, seriously bro, I’m like only second to Jaws and that dude isn’t even real. It’s a total wash out holmes, the Great […]